Categories
Main collection

DRIVE-BY FIREFIGHTER

One minute, your walking the dog. The next…

- - - This is a comic strip - - - We are in the suburbs. John is walking his dog, Dax. A firetruck approaches with its sirens on. Dax is barking. John: EASY DAX. IT’S JUST A FIRETRUCK. A smiling firefighter leans out the passenger window with his hand stuck out. John: OH? HE WANTS A DRIVE-BY HIGH FIVE? WELL... John happily raises his hand, awaiting the high five. Their hands meet. SLAP! But the firefighter grabs John’s hand, dragging him and Dax along next to the speeding firetruck. They arrive at a large house fire. They break with screeching tires. John and Dax tumble forwards, still hanging on the firm grip of the firefighter. Firefighters put a helmet and coat on John. John: BUT BUT BUT… Firefighter: NO TIME FOR BUTS. They hand him a fire hose. Fireman: HERE! HOLD IT TIGHT! John is overpowered by the force of the hose. He sprays everywhere. Fireman: POINT IT AT THE FIRE, NOOB! John is being pushed into a burning building. He’s wearing an oxygen mask and carrying an axe. John is awkwardly hacking his way through a thin door. John returns from the burning building, having rescued a fishbowl with a goldfish in it. We’re at a café. John sits at a table with a friend, exhausted, covered in soot, wearing a dirty white tank top. Dax sits beside John, wearing a tiny firefighter helmet. John: I THINK I JOINED THE INVOLUNTARY FIRE BRIGADE TODAY.

Discover more from CustardFist

Subscribe now to keep reading and get access to the full archive.

Continue reading